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Sue Spitulnik

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Permission to nap

It’s National Public Sleeping Day. Are you one of those people that can sleep anywhere? My husband is. He can sleep on a plane, in the car, in someone’s living room when we are visiting (and he shouldn’t be) or even when we have a house full of people. He can carry on a conversation with me when I return from my night-time bathroom visit and go right back to sleep. Not me. I lay there trying to clear my mind again. I wish I were more like him. His family tells me being able to sleep anywhere is a family trait.

The calendar explains there are different types of naps. The Power Nap is approximately 10 to 20 minutes long and can give a boost of energy to get us through the rest of the day. It also doesn’t leave us drowsy like some longer naps might and will also allow us to fall asleep at a decent time at night.

The Hangover is about 30 minutes long, 10 too many, leaving us loopy and wanting just to stay asleep. We will snap out of it and feel much like we had a Power Nap, but it may take a bit of effort before we feel those benefits.

The Brainiac lasts about 60 minutes and includes the deepest sleep. While we may feel a little grogginess upon waking, much like the Hangover, our ability to recall facts, names and faces, will be improved. This type of nap may be the best nap after a round of studying or before a big test.

The California King lasts about 90 minutes and is typically a full cycle of sleep. It will also include REM or a dream stage. This nap avoids the hangover like the power nap does and improves creative thinking and motor memory, but night time sleep may become elusive.

The point of National Public Sleeping Day is to give a person permission to nap in public. More power to you if you can. Enjoy it.

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Happy Birthday Son

Today is George Washington’s birthday. When I was young, we recognized it on this day, the day it really was, not a convenient Monday so some people could have a three day weekend.

Anyway, it is also my son’s birthday today. His father and I had planned to name him Dustin, from the time we talked about having children. Just before he was born, we found out there was another boy in our little town with that name and the same last name (not related), so the plan changed. In the early-to-mid seventies, the boys names, Joshua, Jeremy, and Jason were extremely popular, courtesy of the TV show “Here Come the Brides”. We picked Jeremy, and added Michael for a middle name thinking he could use that if he didn’t like Jeremy. He goes by J. 

me-and-j

 

When he was born on George’s birthday I suggested we name him that because it was my father’s name, one of our close friend’s name, and it was the 22nd. Thankfully his father disagreed with me and won the discussion. The picture above is a few years old.

I am very proud of my son. He works over 50 hours a week as a UPS driver, plays all weekend with his four year old daughter, and has a good relationship with his fiancé. When they come to family dinner we have a lot of laughs, he does little things around the house for me, and I can go shopping in the town he delivers in and happily admit who I am. It’s a great pleasure to always hear, “Your son is such a good man!”

Happy Birthday Jeremy.  Mom loves you.

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Not Just for the Professionals

It’s National Care Givers Day. According to the National Day of calendar this day is set aside to acknowledge, thank, and give credit to professional care givers. Amen to that! Where would we be without our nurses, doctors, technicians, and even the cleaning and cafeteria crews at a hospital; or the staff in our doctor’s office? These people are there when we need them, hopefully it isn’t too often. Note: they get to go home at the end of their shift.

Let’s take this a step further. After a loved one has a knee replaced, with a hospital stay of only two nights, now who is the caregiver? If someone is going through chemo treatments, with rides needed, meals prepared, the house cleaned, and a gentle touch; now who is the caregiver? If someone is in an auto accident that shakes their security to the core, who is their caregiver? You got it, usually it is a family member or friend.

In my circle, I am known as the hospital sitter. I don’t mind sitting quietly, for hours if necessary, in a hospital room, or waiting room, knowing that I am making the patient just a bit calmer. I’ve done it for my husband, the neighbor, my boss, other family members, and a  fellow Harley rider after a terrible accident that left him in a wheelchair. I’m not looking for praise, it’s a way I can calmly give back. There is a down side. On the odd day I’m needing a boost myself, it’s a little too easy to ask, who is taking care of me? Thankfully that thought doesn’t happen often, or last long.

Currently in the U.S. it is socially acceptable and even suggested to tell a military veteran thank you for their service. It’s about time. May I suggest, if you know a caregiver, especially the stay-at-home type, add them to the list of people to say thank you to. By acknowledging the person that needs the care and the caregiver, you let them know you are concerned for both of them. It will mean a lot as the stay-at-home caregiver often doesn’t have an escape like a professional does.

 

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Keep “Em Guessing

It’s National Do a Grouch a Favor Day. I love the picture they chose, it reminds me of a teacher or grandparent ready to scold a small child who is a might rambunctious, or maybe one that just brought a frog into the class room. I’m curious why they picked a man for the picture. I know quite a few grouchy women too, and, interesting that the person is older.

I tend to be a complainer myself. It’s something I am not proud of, and would love to be able to change easily, but I’m not doing well at my goal. I do however think there is a difference between being a complainer and being grouchy. I see a grouch as not remembering how to have fun and laugh at the world, a practical joke, or him/her-self.

You never know what is in a person’s background that has made them a grouch. I’d be willing to wager it has to do with personal loss,  disillusionment with, or expecting too  much of themselves. I’d also wager they will never tell you, they might not even realize it. This applies to the grouch I know best. There is pain inside the person doesn’t know what to do with, or how to heal from.

Let’s keep the grouches we know guessing by being nice to them. Say hello in a most pleasant voice. Ask them how they  are and wait for an answer. Maybe even take them a plate of cookies, or a single rose. I realize if you are nice, you might get stuck with them as your new best friend, but maybe that is just what they need. Do a grouch a favor, it could make their day.

 

 

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It’s Singles Awareness Day and once again the National Day of Calendar has surprised me. I expected a discourse on loneliness, but the write-up pointed out there are quite a few benefits to being unattached. Singles can come and go as they please with no regard to a partner’s schedule, wants or needs.  Career opportunity?  A single doesn’t need to consult a spouse before accepting an offer or deciding to move.  It’s also easier for a single to keep up healthy habits. There isn’t anyone to sabotage their efforts to work out and eat right.  Singles also tend to be more self-reliant.

I like to have the positive pointed out. It makes me feel good inside and out. I have been on both sides of this coin and could tell you stories all day about my feelings at the different times, but I would probably lose your interest quickly, so, let’s think about a specific type of single.

I am now in the age group that my families, our friends, and the neighbors are finding themselves in the widow and widower category. Single by the passing of time. I think death, even though being a natural part of living, is the cruelest part of life. The other day, a close friend was over. She lost her husband to pancreatic cancer two and a half years ago. She made the comment, “I am lost.” She still has the same job, the same house, her daughter and family are close-by, but without her husband to share the path of life with, she feels lost. I knew him well and miss him too.

When I was working in retail, a large portion of our customers were in the retired group. We would hear of someone losing their spouse so I would give them a little more TLC when they came in. I often heard the remark, “I’m single now, our married friends don’t include me anymore because it’s hard to have an extra person when playing cards or at the dinner table.” How sad is that? I’m sorry that it is a reality.

If I might suggest, when you see someone you know is single, and doesn’t want to be, smile at them and speak. You don’t have to ask how they are, just acknowledge them with some attention. It could be the bright spot in their day. Sometimes all a single needs is someone to be aware.

 

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It’s National Women Physicians Day. According to the National Day of Calendar, 35% of physicians are women and they still earn 8% less than their male counterparts. This day is set aside to honor lady doctors, the strides they have made and bring awareness that those numbers could use some improvement.

I had to think about the fact there are still two male doctors to every one female. I know most of the women I am familiar enough with to talk about our doctors, prefer a woman.  I like the lady Physicians Assistant I go to much better than I like the male doctor she works along side. She has more patience (no pun intended), listens to and hears what I say, and makes me feel like she cares about me as a person. She has empathy.

My husband’s niece is the program director for the Cleveland Clinic’s internal medicine residency program. She has many of letters after her name. She says, “That just means I went to school a lot.” Now, with the current travel ban from certain countries, she is fighting to get one of her doctors back into the U.S.. We are very proud of our Dr. Abby Spencer who is regularly getting awards for her work. When we visit her at home, she’s a loving mother, wife and daughter. I would love to shadow her at work one day. I’m sure I couldn’t keep up with the pace she goes and I know I would have no idea what she was talking about when it came to medical lingo. I do know she likes lots of frosting on her cupcakes!

The very long novel I wrote, that I keep mentioning, has a stern older man doctor in it and his protegé is his great-niece. I have plans to give her a personality much like our Dr. Abby’s. It’s easier to write when you write what you know. Hats off to all women physicians.

 

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